La Tahzan Wa La Khauf

Don't Be Sad My Friends

Relationship between friends

A relationship reflects one’s inner self of positive and negative characteristic. Towards building a good and stable relationship between friends we should be able to love our friends and accept them as the way they are.

Allah SWT tells us in the Qur’an: “He created mankind in a perfect and pure state [And by Nafs (Adam or a person or a soul etc.), and Him Who perfected him in proportion]” (AshShams, 91:7)

Humans are created perfect and basically pure and He gave us will to decide between doing good or evil. We live in this world to worship and serve Him. The status that was given to us human is higher than His other creations. If this is the case, how do we regard each other?

Most of the time we are slave to our emotions. Sometimes we love our friends and there are times when we despised them. There are also times when we feel we are more knowledgeable than them. We may have the knowledge in certain areas but we may be ignorant in some. Nonetheless, as human we can hardly control our emotions, feelings or desires. There is a remedy to all this, if we fill our hearts with love and forgiveness, we will achieve two things: Allah’s forgiveness and a stable emotional state of mind.

Can you imagine being constantly worried and angry all the time? It must be thoroughly exhausting to harbour such negativity all the time. Not only it will make you exhausted unnecessarily, it would also affect the health. This may lead to new problems: phobias, fears, or physical disturbance.

Islam always enjoins us to take care of our health, both spiritually and emotionally. The Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) used to forgive all those who hurt him, but when it came to the rights of others, he would respond appropriately.

If one loves each other for Allah’s sake, it is much easier to forgive. Because when you do something for someone for Allah’s sake, you don’t mind if the person shows gratitude to you or not, because you did that thing for Allah.

We must always practise self-reflection in our lives and ask ourselves questions and ask how true we are to ourselves. Always think about our lives and our actions because Allah SWT bestows us with mind to enable us to think and to keep in touch with our real selves and choose between right and wrong.

If Muslims move from a traditional Muslim society to a place that is based on non-Muslim values and behaviour, they will find a completely different atmosphere. They will find many different kinds of people from many different places. If you used to feel uncomfortable with people from outside your own kind, you will feel like a fish out of water in such a situation. If you haven’t found ways to make yourself strong (in terms of your inner strength), you will probably find yourself imitating some of these new people. In this setting, you will be very glad that you had an Islamic upbringing because it will help you keep your identity. It is your relationship with Allah that is the key to your relationship with the people in your life. If you are close to Allah you will:

• Not judge others, but advise according to the guidance of the Qur’an and Sunnah

• Be positive with those around you

• Forgive others as you hope to be forgiven

• Be warm and friendly and loving to others

• Be generous and kind

Friendship is very sacred and it can be either Paradise or Hell. Choosing the right kinds of friends are very crucial. If we choose the wrong kinds of company, we can be dragged into doing things that are against Allah’s will. This will definitely lead us to road to self-destruction. However, if you choose to be with real friends, those who say and do good things, then you will have more chances to develop yourself and to be a better person.

Friendships should be based on both parties trying to serve Allah and gain His pleasure.
True brothers and sisters in Islam are like one body. “When one part (of the body) feels pain, the other part shares in the pain and fever.” (Al-Bukhari).

Do make your objective in life to serve Allah and thus seek His pleasure and may He guide you to good friends and useful, healthy friendships.


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"To Sharing Islamic Knowledge With Muslims In The World"